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Wednesday, July 26, 2017

Be kind

The death of Chester Bennington makes me concerned about depression.

Before his death, I was reading a lot regarding psychology disorder such as depression and anxiety because I want to know what happened to me these past semester. And I find out that I have a similar simpton of depression. I was so unmotivated. I have no will to live. I sometimes cry myself to sleep. I was having sleeping and eating deprive. I seek solitude. And I did thought about suicidal ideation. But of course I will never do that. It is just because when you are alone with your mind, those thoughts sometimes come around. May God save me from give up my life.

This experience is one of the worse things I've ever been in. Now I am surviving. I really want to help others that's going through what I was going through. I understand the feeling of no one understands you; no one is there for you; you want to be alone but at the same time you want someone to help you. You're always anxious about lots of things; about the future; your responsibility; the burdens you're carrying. You sick of being the one to listen but you just can't help yourself but to be an empathetic person. You start to blame yourself on the things that you don't have to. You start to overthink the unnecessary thoughts. You feel insecure. You beat yourself too much. If I write all of the things I've experienced, it will be a long list.

So, after I received the news regarding Chester Bennington's suicidial, it makes me realize that depression is not a funny business. Not funny at all. You never know which of your friends, colleagues,  housemates, teachers, family members that are going through this disorder. It might be anybody. Maybe even the random guy sitting next to you right now.

That's why it is important to be kind because we never know other people are going through.

One thing to remember, for us as muslims (if we ever go through this), Allah s.w.t. has said in Al-Quran,


 يَا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا لَا تَأْكُلُوا أَمْوَالَكُمْ بَيْنَكُمْ بِالْبَاطِلِ إِلَّا أَنْ تَكُونَ تِجَارَةً عَنْ تَرَاضٍ مِنْكُمْ ۚ وَلَا تَقْتُلُوا أَنْفُسَكُمْ ۚ إِنَّ اللَّهَ كَانَ بِكُمْ رَحِيمًا

O you who have believed, do not consume one another's wealth unjustly but only [in lawful] business by mutual consent. And do not kill yourselves [or one another]. Indeed, Allah is to you ever Merciful.


وَمَنْ يَفْعَلْ ذَٰلِكَ عُدْوَانًا وَظُلْمًا فَسَوْفَ نُصْلِيهِ نَارًا ۚ وَكَانَ ذَٰلِكَ عَلَى اللَّهِ يَسِيرًا

And whoever does that in aggression and injustice - then We will drive him into a Fire. And that, for Allah, is [always] easy.


 إِنْ تَجْتَنِبُوا كَبَائِرَ مَا تُنْهَوْنَ عَنْهُ نُكَفِّرْ عَنْكُمْ سَيِّئَاتِكُمْ وَنُدْخِلْكُمْ مُدْخَلًا كَرِيمًا

If you avoid the major sins which you are forbidden, We will remove from you your lesser sins and admit you to a noble entrance [into Paradise].

My dear sisters and brothers, if you ever going through this I want you to know that you are not alone in this world. You are precious. Your life is precious. You are intelligent. You are special. You are treasured in this world. He choose you to face this obstacle because you have the ability to make this world beautiful; to make others more humane; to spread love; and the most important, to strengthen the faith of the believers and the not yet believers. You have that kind of ability, because you are precious.

Last but not least, I wrote this hoping that YOU who are reading this right now to be aware about depression, anxiety, bipolar and other types of mental disorders. Please, brothers amd sisters, be open minded. Remember that, human are different. Each of us has different name, history, background, family, problems, school. Be kind. Be understanding. Treat others with love and respect. So that we will live in peace and harmony.

“So verily, with hardship, there is ease.” (Quran 94:5)


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